Let's Learn About Immigration
“Hell never checks papers.”
Summoned to order in 2–5 business days · Tracked delivery to the US & Canada
Unholy Pair 10% off 2 · Unholy Trinity 20% off 3+ · applied automatically, no incantation required
Class is in session. Abandon all hope.
A cheerful storybook scene, bright as a classroom poster, the kind of page that teaches the names of rivers and the colours on the map. Today's lesson is geography. Specifically, the geography of the underworld, where every single soul arrives from somewhere else.
The Adversary, it turns out, runs the least fussy border in all creation. No paperwork. No quotas. No velvet rope at the gates, only a ferryman and a very long river. Upstairs, they check the list twice at the pearly door; the abyss simply asks you to wipe your feet. Say what you like about the Dark Lord. He has never once asked where you're from.
For those who failed geography but could still draw you a map of all nine circles.
The vessel · Racerback TankShoulders out, conscience off. A slim racerback built for summer solstice, sweaty rituals and walking away from things without looking back.
Fit & fabricthe vessel
Slim fit with a racerback cut and scooped neckline. Between sizes? Size up.
- 60% combed ring-spun cotton, 40% polyester
- Extra-light 4 oz/yd² (135 g/m²)
- Side seams and self-fabric binding
- Tear-away label
- Blank: Next Level 1533. Printed to order, direct-to-garment or direct-to-film depending on the print partner.
Size chartmeasure twice, sin once
| XS | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Chest width (flat) | 14.035.5 | 15.038.1 | 16.040.6 | 17.043.1 | 18.045.7 | 19.048.2 |
| Body length | 27.068.5 | 27.569.8 | 28.071.0 | 28.572.3 | 29.073.6 | 29.574.9 |
Measured flat on the garment. Allow up to about 1.5 in (3.8 cm) either way. Chest width × 2 ≈ full chest.
Delivery & returnsforgiveness sold separately
| To | Cost | Arrives |
|---|---|---|
| United States | US$4.95 · free on $65+ | 2–5 business days after printing |
| Canada | US$9.95 (shown in CAD) · free on US$90+ | 10–30 business days after printing |
Printing takes 2–5 business days. Nothing is made until you order it, so there are no returns for a change of heart or size. Forgiveness sold separately. Damaged, defective or wrong? Tell us within 30 days of delivery and we'll replace or refund it. Refund policy · Shipping policy
Careaftercare rites
- Machine wash cold (max 30°C / 90°F)
- Do not bleach
- Tumble dry low
- Do not iron
- Do not dry-clean
Blame Satan. Keep the shirt.
Wear it, tag it: #SatanMadeMeBuyItSame sin, different lesson · Wear your sins
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Size & fit
Measure twice. Sin once. Printed-to-order means no size swaps.
Racerback Tank · Next Level 1533
Slim fit with a racerback cut and scooped neckline. Between sizes? Size up.
| XS | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Chest width (flat) | 14.035.5 | 15.038.1 | 16.040.6 | 17.043.1 | 18.045.7 | 19.048.2 |
| Body length | 27.068.5 | 27.569.8 | 28.071.0 | 28.572.3 | 29.073.6 | 29.574.9 |
Measured flat on the garment. Allow up to about 1.5 in (3.8 cm) either way. Chest width × 2 ≈ full chest.
How to measure: lay your best-fitting shirt flat and measure straight across the chest, 1 in below the armpits, then from the highest point of the shoulder to the hem. Compare with the table. All size guides
Racerback Tank · Choose a size