Let's Ruin Christmas
“Peace on earth, pending.”
Summoned to order in 2–5 business days · Tracked delivery to the US & Canada
Unholy Pair 10% off 2 · Unholy Trinity 20% off 3+ · applied automatically, no incantation required
Deck the halls with old grievances.
A merry storybook holiday, all festive red and gold, glowing like the cover of a carol book. Everyone looks happy. Everyone looks together. It is the most wholesome picture imaginable, which makes it the perfect altar for a small, deliberate sacrifice: the family's peace.
The Adversary's holiday tradition is simple. Wait until the table is full and the toast has been made. Then unwrap the grievance you've been ageing since last December, the one everyone begged you to leave alone. Timing is the whole ritual. Nobody ever forgets a Christmas like that. You're going to hell. Dress for it.
For relatives who arrive with a casserole in one hand and a forty-year grudge in the other.
The vessel · Women's TeeCut for her. Blessed by no one. A relaxed women's fit for anyone who read the fine print, laughed, and signed anyway.
Fit & fabricthe vessel
Women's relaxed fit. Roomier than a fitted tee. Want it oversized? Size up, or choose the Unisex Tee.
- 100% cotton on solid colours (heathers include polyester)
- Lightweight 4.3 oz/yd²
- Seamless ribbed collar, double-needle hems
- Neck and shoulder twill tape
- Blank: Bella+Canvas 6400. Printed to order, direct-to-garment or direct-to-film depending on the print partner.
Size chartmeasure twice, sin once
| S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Chest width (flat) | 18.547.0 | 20.050.8 | 22.055.9 | 24.061.0 | 26.066.0 | 28.071.1 |
| Body length | 25.364.1 | 26.066.0 | 26.767.8 | 27.569.8 | 28.271.8 | 29.073.7 |
Measured flat on the garment. Allow up to about 1.5 in (3.8 cm) either way. Chest width × 2 ≈ full chest.
Delivery & returnsforgiveness sold separately
| To | Cost | Arrives |
|---|---|---|
| United States | US$4.95 · free on $65+ | 2–5 business days after printing |
| Canada | US$9.95 (shown in CAD) · free on US$90+ | 10–30 business days after printing |
Printing takes 2–5 business days. Nothing is made until you order it, so there are no returns for a change of heart or size. Forgiveness sold separately. Damaged, defective or wrong? Tell us within 30 days of delivery and we'll replace or refund it. Refund policy · Shipping policy
Careaftercare rites
- Machine wash cold (max 30°C / 90°F)
- Do not bleach
- Do not tumble dry
- Iron, steam or dry on low heat
- Do not dry-clean
Blame Satan. Keep the shirt.
Wear it, tag it: #SatanMadeMeBuyItSame sin, different lesson · Wear your sins
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Size & fit
Measure twice. Sin once. Printed-to-order means no size swaps.
Women's Tee · Bella+Canvas 6400
Women's relaxed fit. Roomier than a fitted tee. Want it oversized? Size up, or choose the Unisex Tee.
| S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Chest width (flat) | 18.547.0 | 20.050.8 | 22.055.9 | 24.061.0 | 26.066.0 | 28.071.1 |
| Body length | 25.364.1 | 26.066.0 | 26.767.8 | 27.569.8 | 28.271.8 | 29.073.7 |
Measured flat on the garment. Allow up to about 1.5 in (3.8 cm) either way. Chest width × 2 ≈ full chest.
How to measure: lay your best-fitting shirt flat and measure straight across the chest, 1 in below the armpits, then from the highest point of the shoulder to the hem. Compare with the table. All size guides
Women's Tee · Choose a size